Tuesday, June 30, 2009

Quality or Quantity?

Many years ago, there was a fad for spending 'quality time' with children. The reasoning behind it was that kids wanted to do enjoyable things with parents rather than just have them there for as long as possible. It was not something I subscribed to then (I didn't have kids at the time) and I don't subscribe to now (I have three boys now).

There are times and situations where it isn't possible to spend quantity time with children, ranging from economic need to a short term hiatus. I can't help wondering, though, if this fad had more to do with some parents desire to be wealthy, rather than with the needs of their children.

We need as parents to do quality things with the kids, but I also feel that we need as much quantity 'being there' as possible, especially if they're young.

This is even more true with writing. It's all well and good us spending 'quality time' with our books and writing, but if we don't spend enough 'quantity time', how do we get to the detail of the plot lines or find our inspiration?

As amateur writers we have pressing economic needs and families that take us away from this quantity time, but we need to be aware of this time problem and be less hard on ourselves.

Doing our best for our children means making some sacrifices, yet despite that we won't always be able to spend 'quantity time' with them. It's the same with our writing. We aren't professional writers, yet, and need to cut ourselves some slack.


Justus M. Bowman said...

We do the best we can.

Lady Glamis said...

What a great post! I struggle with this constantly, both with my book and my child.

Eric said...

This is a great post. My wife and I talk about this all the time, because we are weird parents in comparison to so many others. Probably 90% of our time (outside of work) is spent with our kids in some fashion. We don't go out much (which is probably bad for our own relationship), and we spend a huge amount of time with our kids. My oldest son went to wrestling camp recently for five days, and it was weird (and really hard). Both of our boys are going to visit with their grandparents out of state for two weeks, and it will be another weird and hard period of time for us. Maybe this time we'll figure out how to spend time as a couple though. Who knows.